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 Archive 2 of Past Columns |
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Archive 2 of Past Columns |
TIME TO GO NOW School is out and my weekly articles end for the season. For every thing, there is a time and a purpose under heaven. It is time for me to rest, relax with the family and de-stress. Summer will be a period of welcome respite and rejuvenation. No more mad dashes in the morning and no more homework! We are looking forward to long lazy days with no schedules and nothing to do but hang out with friends.
Long ago, in the 1980’s, my life revolved around my career and I was obsessed with my work. My schedule was booked, and the days were very long and full. The least favorite part of my job was reading the obituaries in the New York Times each morning. This was a job requirement that actually depressed me until I began to get into it. As an employee in an art auction company, we were looking for estates that needed to be liquidated. Soon I began to appreciate the fascinating lives I was reading about. Many of the people who had passed away had just completed a big project or accomplished a major task.
I wondered why things happened when they happened. My favorite cartoonist Charles Schultz died recently. Is it simply a coincidence that his final comic strip was printed that day? Was it his time to go as soon as the work was finished? Last year Stanley Kubrick died suddenly after editing and viewing his first movie in years. Did he know it was his last project? It’s that perfect timing again. Just as one door closes, God opens another. An era ends and one begins. A chapter closes and another will be written.The world turns and the moon goes through its phases. The sun rises, sets, and before we know it the babes we carried in our arms are getting taller than we are. We never actually know where we are going but we plow ahead and go by instinct…not knowing how many days, weeks or months we have ahead of us. If we knew we were running out of time soon, maybe we would not be such time wasters. All the time in the world and no one has enough time. Your life is in your hands. So get what you want done, and do not put everything off. Live it up this summer! Contrary to popular belief, it is the last summer of the 20th century.
CONNECTIVITY The first thing I loved about Longmeadow was the Town Green. When we drove into town the beautiful colonial architecture amazed me…a pristine time capsule of history! All was quiet, and we saw not a soul! The realtor drove us around and showed us a few lovely neighborhoods, yet no one was walking on the shady old tree-lined sidewalks. I felt like I was a stranger in a strange land, where ghosts and witches roamed. Literally, we saw not a single person during the first two hours in town.
After finding a home that we were possibly interested in, we needed something to eat and drink. The realtor drove us east on Bliss Road and suddenly we saw humanity! There was a huge lacrosse tournament and hundreds of people lined the playing fields! The town appeared deserted because it was a long weekend, but all the action was in the "other" town center. What is the center of town anyway? Is it the 17th Century town green or the shopping area on the east end of town near the Longmeadow Shops?This place is like a college-town that clears out on weekends. During the week, our world revolves around the lives of our children and their schedules. If I want some human contact with someone other than a child, the only way to see people was to bump into them at the Big Y or the school. Because there are no side streets in a village-type setting, it is hard to run into someone by accident. It is hard to get a pulse on what is going on in town on a day to day basis unless you see other people. All the committee meetings happen at night. It is hard for young parents to get involved in town government or community service during the evening hours because the kids and their homework come first. How can I get involved in the community and know what is really going on, and how things work unless I have a babysitter for every evening of the week? Life goes on during the daytime hours. Where can you learn the community news during daylight hours? You can get some information at the Town Hall or the Community House, but the real place to meet people is Starbucks!
That’s right! Starbucks has revolutionized the quiet little town of Longmeadow. If you need to meet someone and get something done, you meet them at Starbucks! In the mornings, after I drop off the kids in the morning, I sometimes stop there. Regulars do not go there simply for the coffee; they go for the fellowship. They go to feel connected. They go to see who they will meet. They go to socialize. They go to solve problems. They go to read the paper and see friends. They go for serendipity and coincidence. I hear that the Cherry and Webb space will be divided up into possibly three spaces. Maybe we will get a bakery or a deli or another type of meeting place. Starbucks doesn’t need to be the only place in town to meet people. There is strength in numbers and it is important to feel connected.SAVE OUR OPEN SPACE Many residents have already completed the Open Space questionnaire that the Conservation Commission has written. Whether you received it via your child’s backpack or picked one up at the booth on Long Meddowe Days, I am sure the questions were thought provoking. How do you spend your free time in Longmeadow? Are you a bird watcher, tennis player or jogger? Is keeping the open space open a priority for you as a resident of the town? What are the threats to our land? What can we do about the future of this community?
If you have not already completed the questionnaire, please pick one up at the Town Hall and return it as soon as possible to the Conservation Commission. We are very lucky to live in a small town where we can enjoy several parks and wildlife areas. Are these areas protected?
Land that is owned by the town, like Bliss Park, Greenwood Park, Turner Park and the Meadows are protected forever. Unfortunately, privately held land can be developed as long as there is not an issue with the laws concerning wetlands. One of the last lots on Longmeadow Street, just south of the green is being developed. A tastefully designed home will be built there, but do we have the necessary laws in place by the zoning and planning boards to protect the remaining lots in town? The historic district has strict laws and regulations concerning architectural designs in keeping with the character of the town…but what about other neighborhoods? Many residents are adding to their homes and bringing older buildings up to date, but not every person is sensitive to the overall character of the neighborhoods. The scale and overall design of a building can overwhelm a streetscape if it is not done with sensitivity.
The area off Mill Road is a favorite place for many residents to walk and enjoy nature. It is well known that there are beaver dams back there deep in the woods, and it is an excellent place to get away from it all. This land was owned by a family trust for many years, and we are lucky it remains pristine. Let’s keep natural areas such as this open and preserved as a wildlife refuge. The world is being swallowed up by developments all around us. There is very little open land near the cities of New York and Boston, but we are very close to the city of Springfield and our landscape is beautiful and historic. The world around us has moved ahead at a very fast pace and we have resisted change. I hope that all concerned residents will agree that the open land in Longmeadow is priceless! Get involved in saving our open space!
THE LUSTY MONTH OF MAY Do you remember the song from Oklahoma! called "It’s May!" Well, Spring is finally in the air, and the birds and the bees seem happier than they have in months. Romance flourishes during this time of year!
About a year ago, I was reading a copy of Ladies Home Journal while exercising at the JCC. I must admit that it is not one of my favorite magazines but for some odd reason, I was drawn to that issue. Well, I found that Springfield held a very dubious distinction in the ratings for the most romantic cities in America.
Lingerie and chocolate sales dictate the top cities for romance, along with options for fine dining and other seemingly obscure criteria dictated by the editors of the magazine. So ladies and gentlemen, here are the top cities to live in if you want to have a great love life.
1. San Francisco, California
2. Denver, Colorado
3. Concord, California
4. Salt Lake City, Utah
5. Lakewood, Colorado
6. Hayward, California
7. Reno, Nevada
8. Fremont, California
9. Scottsdale, Arizona
10. New York City, New YorkUnfortunately, Springfield is at the bottom of the list. Supposedly, these are the ten worst places to be for romance.
191. Fargo, North Dakota
192. Waterbury, Connecticut
193. Louisville, Kentucky
194. Pasadena, Texas
195. Cleveland, Ohio
196. Chesapeake, Virginia
197. Macon, Georgia
198. Springfield, Massachusetts
199. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
200. Brownsville, TexasI am sorry to break the bad news to you. I guess if you want to visit a romantic destination for your next vacation you can use the list above for reference. We found the San Francisco area was a good honeymoon spot. At least we don’t live in Brownsville, Texas.
A WOMAN'S WISDOM To survive in this world, common sense, old-fashioned values and emotional intelligence are almost more important than brains. In a confusing world that is changing too rapidly, it is important to keep your life simple. Take time to reflect, be kind to others, share time with close friends and keep away negative energy. The following words contain some divine wisdom.
"People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, People may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway."A messenger brought these special pearls of wisdom to you from God. These are the words of Mother Teresa.
KINDERGARTEN This past week I attended the Kindergarten Orientation at Blueberry Hill School. This annual rite of passage for 5-year-olds was especially poignant for me. Many parents well up with emotion when they realize their child is entering such a new phase. My only son and last child is entering the Longmeadow School System. He was excited but hesitant! His concern was this, "But I don’t know how to read!" My husband and I reassured him that he did not need to read until first grade and he could learn and play at school with his friends. The day went very well, but I am the one with concerns!
The school is very overcrowded! My son is used to attending a pre-school with a class of 12 children. It looks like his class will have at least 25+ kids competing for attention, and trying to learn. This is unacceptable to me! The other two schools in town have increased enrollment also! There will be an addition to the Blueberry Hill School, but it is not happening fast enough. We have space problems now! Remember the Art Teacher is still roomless! There was a kindergarten teacher added 2 days before school started last fall. It looks like we will still need her, but her position may be cut from the budget because the Appropriations Committee refuses to listen to the School Committee. I know that school costs are rising and that special education is a huge drain on the system. We must face facts…our children are the future and we cannot let class size suffer because we are too frugal in the wrong areas!
I was reminded of the essay from long ago about kindergarten, by Robert Fulghum. Let’s try to learn from the 5-year-olds! This town is stuck in the past and we need to wake up! The reputation of the school is excellent, but we are not keeping up with the times! The budget for the school system keeps rising! We need to be creative, and raise money by creating an endowment or foundation like East Longmeadow did! The real estate taxes cannot cover the costs currently! The PTO’s raise large sums of money each year to make ends meet. Let’s start listening to each other. I am sick of the same problem with the school budget each year. Must we act out the same charade year after year? We are not talking about cutting out the gravy; we are cutting the meat to the bone.
Every year the Town Meeting pits the old against the young. The timing of the meetings is bad. In many cases, both parents must work to keep up with the increasing cost of living. Parents must hire baby sitters to attend the meetings and many do not bother because they are tired and busy coping with the demands of parenthood. The system is old and outmoded; in fact, it dates from the early 1700’s. In the early days of this town, attendance at the annual town meeting was mandatory. Now we are lucky if 400 people show up, when there are over 10,000 residents of voting age. Let’s change the local government and embrace efficiency. We are in this together folks! Let’s work to meet the needs of our children and grandchildren!
"All I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom is not at the top of the graduate-school mountain, but there in the sandpile. These are the things I learned:
1. Share everything
2. Play fair
3. Don’t hurt people
4. Put things back where you found them
5. Clean up your own mess
6. Don’t take things that aren’t yours
7. Say you are sorry when you hurt somebody
8. Wash your hands before you eat
9. Flush
10. Warm cookies and milk are good for you
11. Live a balanced life, learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
12. Take a nap every afternoon
13. When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.
14. Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the styrofoam cup: The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that. Goldfish, hamsters, white mice, and even the little seed in the cup- they all die. So do we.
15. And then remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned-the biggest word of all-LOOK.
16. Everything you need to know is in there somewhere. The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation. Ecology and politics and equality and sane living. Take any one of those items and extrapolate it into sophisticated adult terms and apply it to your family life or your work or your government or your world and it holds true, clear, and firm.
17. Think what a better world it would be if we all, the whole world, had cookies and milk about three o’clock every afternoon and then lay down with our blankies for a nap. Or if all governments had as a basic policy to always put things back where they found them and to clean up their own mess. And it is still true, no matter how old you are, when you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.So, my fellow Longmeadowans, let’s stick together and respect each other. We can make this town an even better place if we open our eyes and look! We are not living in a perfect place. We can improve our community and make it a better place if we simply listen to each other and play fair. A great education should last a lifetime and it is not free.
IT'S MAY Longmeadow is awakening from its season of hibernation. There seems to be a lot going
on in the spring and fall in this town. All the snowbirds have returned from point’s south, and the month of May is full of activities. Mark your calendars!
- May 6- Tour of Homes, Fundraising Event for Center School, see six Longmeadow Homes from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. during a sunny Saturday (keep your fingers crossed). Please buy your tickets at William Burrows Florist, Longmeadow Flowers or Coldwell Banker Real Estate while they last!
- May 9- Annual Town Meeting, 7:30 at the High School, see the "Reminder" for the warrant. Important issues include funding for "The Longmeadow Plan". Please participate! With a town population of almost 16,000 people, usually 400 residents attend the Town Meeting. Maybe there is a better way… How about on-line voting?
- May 19/20/21- Annual Celebration, "Long Meddowe Days" on the town green. Fund Raising event for the Longmeadow Historical Society. This one event brings our whole community together. Go on a historical walking tour, listen to music, go to the crafts fair, meet your friends, bring your kids and have fun!
- May 23- Town Election at the Community House. Get out and vote from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. The town voted for a bi-law change last year, making May the month for elections from now on, instead of March. Contested races include the School Committee, The Planning Board and The Park Commissioners. Gerald Nolet is running again as a Selectman in an uncontested race. Other unopposed residents on the ballot are Thomas Herrala for Moderator, David French for Assessor and Kenneth Taylor for Water and Sewer Commissioner. Two men are running for The Housing Authority and there is room for a write-in candidate. My question is this….what is the Housing Authority and what do the people do who we are electing? Is there a reason a residential community like this one even needs a Housing Authority?
Many residents clear out of town after school closes on June 19. The summer is a quiet time here in Longmeadow. For those of us that stay, it is a very peaceful place to spend the summer by the pool, or exploring Western Massachusetts and Northern Connecticut.
This coming fall the Longmeadow Historical Society will sponsor it’s first ever Appraisal Day. If you watch the popular PBS TV show, "The Antiques Road Show" you know what the event is all about. Town residents can bring objects to the Community House on Wednesday, October 25 as part of a new fund raising event. Over the summer, think about what treasures you have stored away in the attic from your ancestors. Save the date!
BRIGHTWOOD'S NEW PET There is a new pet at Brightwood Hardware. Although Moe Fieldstein no longer runs an extensive pet store, there are still lots of birds for sale, the famous parrot "Tai" to talk to and now a new pet to listen to. Yes folks, there is a singing fish at my favorite hardware store! Go see for yourself! Big Mouth Billy Bass sings "Don’t Worry Be Happy" and "Take Me To the River". He can be yours for a reasonable price, but the fish has been so popular nationwide that it is on backorder. Moe has already sold 80 such fish and they make a unique gift or just a special conversation piece for your home.
We are very lucky to have a store like Brightwood Hardware in our hometown. In a world full of mega-chain do-it-yourself warehouse madness, it is wonderful to go to Moe’s and get personal service. My children and I visit often for the friendly atmosphere and much as for the miscellaneous gadgets, gismos and tools we need for our home. I love the blue footprints that go to the basement, the selection of items and the animals. My son always looks for the Matchbox cars and the coin wishing well for the animals in Forest Park!
Moe’s father started the business in the Brightwood section of Springfield in 1921. In 1960, he opened the store in Longmeadow, and business is steady. The experienced staff is a wealth of information and advice and the atmosphere reminds me of days gone by. If you need anything at all, Brightwood probably has it. If not, Moe knows where to find it. He has even directed me to other stores in Massachusetts or Connecticut that sell things he does not stock.
When we had out-of-town visitors this week, we just had to pay a visit to the local hardware store. It was a memorable part of their visit to Longmeadow. If you haven’t been there recently, pay a visit to Brightwood Hardware. You will get a good laugh from Billy Bass...and we can always use a good laugh!
HAIL TO THE CHIEF Thanks to Police Chief Richard Marchese and his staff, there are safer roads in Longmeadow. After a two-three year effort to change the speed limit on Farmington Road and other neighborhood side streets, we have been rewarded with new 25-MPH signs. This may not be welcome to those residents that use the side streets to "cut-through" Forest Acres (a.k.a. The Kibbe Tract) and miss a few traffic lights, but it is great for the local residents. When we arrived here our son was a one-½ year old wild boy, who delighted in terrifying his mom by running towards the street. This idyllic neighborhood looked quiet upon first inspection during the summer months, but as soon as school started that changed. Cars began zooming by almost like clockwork during the peak hours of the day.
After walking around the neighborhood with a petition, I wrote to the police department. That is when I learned that Boston had to do a traffic study. I had assumed incorrectly that the town government could control things like speed limits and traffic signs. Things are much more complicated than they appear around here, and Boston moved slowly on this matter. Once again, I get the feeling that Longmeadow is a colony of Boston. The police chief’s efforts are much appreciated and hopefully the roads will be safer for our young children.
On another matter concerning the safety of our children, I need to clarify a statement I made in the March 23 issue of the Longmeadow News. In my column that week, I wrote, "If you try alcohol or drugs do not drive under any circumstances." In retrospect, I realized that this statement might have been misconstrued. Obviously, illegal behavior is not encouraged. The fact is that 79% of high school seniors drink alcohol. Unfortunately 30% drink alcohol at home with their parent’s knowledge. Parents that serve alcohol to minors cannot always control the situation, and the police department responds to party problems each year. The "Safe Homes Network" lists names of families that will not host unsupervised events in their homes.
A HISTORIC OUTPOST? The April 2000 issue of Boston Magazine lists Longmeadow as a desirable "outer limits" suburb. Our state capital is getting so crowded, overbuilt and expensive, that homebuyers must venture west past 495 to find housing. The recent issue of Newsweek has several articles about the "New" Middle Age, concerning the Baby Boomers growing up. What is our colonial-era town headed for over the next 20 years? We must attempt to preserve the history and charm of our unique community, while planning for change and embracing the future.
To quote the Boston magazine article, "If you want a nice house in a hip neighborhood, find a Starbucks." Well, the famed coffee chain was not here in May 1996 when we were looking around…Nevertheless, they found Longmeadow and business appears to be good. It’s almost impossible to move back to Boston or New York. Investment bankers and Internet moguls have invaded the places we left and they receive bonuses that make regular salaries seem like paltry allowances! Despite the somewhat insular feel of Longmeadow, we are effected by large-scale trends occurring across the country. In Harry S. Dent’s recent book, "The Roaring 2000’s," he argues that migration from big cities will accelerate as a result of the New Economy. The Internet is promoting a decentralization of commerce. This trend will have a palpable impact on Longmeadow.
Unfortunately, higher taxes may be inevitable. I am not happy about this. Many seniors are living on a fixed income during their retirement years and find it difficult to accept. The burden of higher taxes is also borne by younger folks who are only just making ends meet from paycheck to paycheck. Those who have children in private schools do not want to pay more taxes for schools they don’t use. How are we supposed to plan for retirement, save for expensive college costs when we are paying off debts, and have enough cash for braces, piano lessons and babysitters? There are too many baby boomers, but that is the fault of our parents.
It is time to involve all residents in a dialogue concerning our vision for Longmeadow. The historic nature of the place drew us here, along with the attractive neighborhoods and the reputation of the schools. Running six school buildings is expensive; especially if they were not kept up to date. We must forge ahead and get involved!
What are the priorities for the residents? What is best for our children? What do the teenagers need? What draws people here? The real estate market is tight now and there is no where to build new homes. Newer residents are now more likely to stay here because the suburbs closer to NY & Boston are getting astronomical prices for the simplest of homes. If I moved back to my Longmeadow-like hometown, I would be living in a tiny shack. Even the towns close to Hartford are more expensive.
Change is inevitable. If we resist change, we ultimately will be overwhelmed by it. The Planning and Zoning Boards must preserve the special, historic nature of our town. Open space must stay that way! Traffic problems must be addressed. The schools will be renovated, and we need to improve the Town Hall and Community House. Efficiency is needed to get things done on a timely basis. Wasting time will cost us in the end. I question the Town Meeting format because vital issues come up more often than once or twice a year and it is very inefficient. Ballot voting for important issues is more practical because a majority of residents can participate. We should explore the use of the Internet for educating and involving more of Longmeadow’s residents in deciding on town issues. Let your leaders know what your goals are. A special task force needs your ideas and input for a well thought out plan. Young and old, we all appreciate Longmeadow as a great community. Let’s keep it that way as we prepare for the 21st Century.
VISION-COURAGE-FAITH My mom and I recently visited the Loomis Chaffee School in historic Windsor, Connecticut. It was a beautiful spring day and we enjoyed walking around the sprawling campus. A statue caught my eye…inscribed on the stonework were the words Vision-Courage-Faith.
The importance of this message struck me, and upon reflection, I have found deeper meaning in the words. We all must have vision to reach our goals and follow our unique paths. It takes courage to follow your heart and we must listen to our conscience and intuition. Faith in ourselves is the most important, and faith in God gives us a strong foundation.
I am moved by the actions of Pope John Paul II. The apology is long overdue. He always wanted to visit the Holy Lands; he had a purpose and a goal. With the courage to speak out he is guided by a deep spiritual faith in God. Is the God of the Jews the SAME as the God of the Christians? I think so.
Judaism is the faith OF Jesus and Christianity is the faith IN Jesus. I believe that Jesus is the Son of God, because I was brought up as a Christian. We are all children of God. Does God lead us through our lives and answer our prayers? Let us celebrate our similarities and get over the historical divisions. John Paul’s words are bold and beautiful. He has finally acknowledged that the church must "beg for forgiveness for past and present sins." The tragedies of World War II were not that long ago. The world is still fighting religious wars…when will it end?
I have a vision. I hope my children can grow up in a world of Christians and Jews living together in harmony. It is the year 2000 now; we cannot live in the past. Will there ever be a time when we can see past religious beliefs, and just see the person deep inside. Do not be fooled by appearances. Who cares what religion my neighbors are? Many of Jesus’ values are Jewish values. When we celebrate Passover and Easter let us remember we are all humans, here on this earth temporarily. We each make our mark, and we should live in peace and help eachother learn from all the good the Pope is doing.
I recently found this poem in an old copy of my high school paper. I grew up in a town of Christians but we had excellent teachers that were Jewish.
"Roses are red
Violets are bluish
If it weren’t for Christmas
We’d all be Jewish"NAME GAME TIME A lot has changed in the last 100 years! In 1900 it was still the Victorian era and now we are living in the Internet era! The typical American living at the beginning of the 20th Century was a boy named John, who was not yet a teenager. He lived on a farm in New York or Pennsylvania and his family made about $3,000 a year. Indoor plumbing was rare, there were no phones nor cars and life was physically quite hard. John may have attended a one-room school, probably would not finish high school and could expect to live to age 46.
According to the Census Bureau, the typical American today is a young woman named Lisa, age 25 to 34. She lives in a California suburb with her daughter Emily and odds are about 50/50 that she is still married to the father of her child. Her life expectancy is to age 79, and is 74 for a male. She earns about $45,000 per year, probably has two cars and cable TV. Lisa has almost definitely finished college.
We have all received our Census forms in the mail. I hope that you have already completed the information and returned the envelope. In addition to keeping track of who is where and how old we all are the census records the popularity of names. In 1900, the top 10 names for boys were John, William, James, George, Charles, Joseph, Frank, Henry, Robert and Harry. For girls, the favorite names were Mary, Helen, Anna, Margaret, Ruth, Elizabeth, Marie, Rose, Florence and Bertha. Today, the preferences are quite different; the most popular names from 1999 are: Michael, Jacob, Matthew, Christopher, Joshua, Austin, Nicholas, Tyler, Joseph, Emily, Samantha, Madison, Ashley, Sarah, Hannah, Jessica, Alyssa, Alexis and Kayla.
So much has changed; in fact, the world has transformed. Since I was born in the late 50’s technology has transformed our world. I remember when no one has a color TV. I went to college with an electric typewriter, white out, and a stereo with a turntable. I hate to tell you what the computers looked like at the computer center…there were hole-punched cards and the machines were huge and loud! If Jacob and Kayla saw what I thought was state-of-the art in the 1970’s they would think I was an antique!
IT'S SO BORING I attended a forum at the Community House concerning Longmeadow’s youth. The presentations by the teens were excellent, and the experience brought me back to the mid 1970’s. Adolescence is VERY HARD! Most of us felt depressed, overwhelmed with schoolwork, pressure from parents to succeed and then they are those hormones…. It is NOT EASY! I would not want to do it again. The problems of today are the same problems I faced over 25 years ago. Somehow I survived, but I know many people who had trouble due to bad choices. I would like to make the teen years better for Longmeadow’s youth before my children become teenagers.
Listening to the pressures facing the students was a total de ja vu! Longmeadow is a nice place to grow up because it is safe and the citizens care for the community, but it is totally stuck in the past. I love the historic nature of the place, yet I agree it can be boring! There is nothing around here! The mindset is just like the one I grew up with in the 1970’s. Everyone is walking around in bellbottoms and down vests. In fact, the background music is the same; Steely Dan and Santana just came out with new material!
There is more offered in this community for senior citizens! What about our responsibility to prepare our youth to be future leaders. Where are the teens supposed to spend time relaxing? Life cannot be lived under a magnifying glass! The Teen Center is a good start, but students need another destination as they mature. A movie theater and skating rink are excellent suggestions. Let’s continue this dialogue, so more ideas can be exchanged!
We cannot keep all of the teens from experimenting with alcohol, drugs and sex. Parents can set a good example, and keep communication open. Find out what your kids are doing and give them hugs! We need to teach maturity, responsibility and that choices matter. Things that happen in the teen years can effect the path you follow. Mistakes made at the beginning of your life can limit the choices later. One bad move and the consequences can ruin a life, or maybe just a reputation. I have seen it so many times. Common sense is almost more valuable than intelligence. Just because a student gets A’s and B’s, and has not been caught yet, does not mean they are issue free!
My advice…..Enjoy the high school years and do not waste them. Grown-up responsibilities are not any picnic either. If you try alcohol or drugs do not drive under any circumstances! If parents think there is a substance abuse problem, think about possible family struggles that could be causing your teen concern. Do not bother smoking cigarettes, they stink, are very unattractive and it is hard to quit once you start. Who cares what your "friends" are doing. Everyone’s tolerance is different and you need to decide how you want to live your life and what direction is right for you. Be an independent thinker. Find adults you can trust for advice!
I am not sure it really is that boring here. After four years near Boston and eleven years in Manhattan, Longmeadow is the antidote to civilization for me. It is peaceful, beautiful and I can think of a lot more undesirable places to live. Yes, it is isolated but teenagers feel isolated almost anywhere. They are not children and not quite adults yet, but we need to respect their feelings and listen to their concerns. Any improvements to the services offered in the town are a move in the right direction! At least we could get a few places to eat and meet people. There is something drastically wrong with a small town that has seven banks, two CVS stores and no bakery or bookstore! Imagine a mini-mall with café, bakery, bookstore, shops and a gourmet deli in the Cherry & Webb space!
WRITE ON I would like to hear from you. Please let me know your thoughts and possible ideas for future articles featured in "Let’s Talk." My column has now appeared in this paper for almost two years, and my list of possible subjects is growing; yet, I can always use new ideas. Is there an issue or local event that I should be covering?
I found a quote by Rebecca West that I jotted down during my college days. During those years, I never would have imagined having a job as a writer. It is particularly fitting to find these insightful words again after so much time. "Writers write for themselves and not for their readers. Art has nothing to do with communication between persons, only with communication between different parts of a person’s mind."
How did I end up as a writer? I ask myself this question often. Well, it all started with my grandmother. She passed away in 1995, but her influence on my life has been pervasive. I saw her weekly for the first 18 years of my life. She was always around, helping my parents with babysitting and running the house. Despite her seemingly constant attention, she and I maintained a fine correspondence. I have found piles of her letters, and the letters I sent to her. It is a fascinating exercise to re-read things that I have not seen for 20-30 years. The memories are triggered from the recesses of my mind. There is no transcript or evidence of past telephone conversations….so all that information is lost if you cannot remember what was said.
Letter writing is a dying art…maybe e-mail will rekindle the love of writing! It is a great way to communicate with friends who are hard to reach by phone. My friends with young children can never talk on the phone, due to the constant interruption. E-mail has helped me communicate with my family and friends who are far away. So, if you cannot write a letter try e-mail. The only problem is that there will be nothing printed to look back on in the years to come.
LOOKING BACKWARD TO THE FUTURE Remember the movie from the 1980’s called "Back to the Future?" Well, there is an excellent exhibition at the Connecticut Valley Historical Society called "Looking Backward to the Future: Springfield Visions and Visionaries" highlighting the history of this local area. For someone like me who knows very little about Western Massachusetts, it is an excellent introduction to the events and people that shaped the area in days gone by.
The title is taken from a book by Edward Bellamy, published in 1888. This Chicopee Falls native was a genius and an authentic prophet who wrote an important literary masterpiece about time travel. For some reason, I had not been exposed to the book during my school years, but, "Looking Backward 2000-1887" is an excellent thought-provoking book. The story is about a man from Boston who falls asleep in 1887 and for some unusual reason wakes up in the year 2000. The book jacket states, "It has long been considered by authorities as the second most influential book of modern times, ranking next to Karl Marx’s Das Kapital." It is a bit hard to read due to the style of writing, but I still recommend the book highly! A printing from 1926 is available at the Storrs Library.
It is fascinating to read what an author in 1887 predicted for the future…and he was right! He really did have an uncanny and accurate forecast for inventions of the 20th century. He imagined a Utopian future after a non-violent revolution with television, radio, concrete highways, wireless communication, air travel, air conditioning, automobiles and even farm tractors! Was he psychic or just lucky in his predictions?
The exhibition also features inventions and inventors from the area. The famous local people include: Milton Bradley (1836-1911) who started the games company, Harry Austin Knox (1875-1957) who made cars and trucks, Robert Frost (1916-1963) who taught at Amherst, John Breck (1877-1965) who was born in Holyoke and invented the famous shampoo (remember the Breck girls?) Everett Barney who patented the snap-on ice-skate…..to name but a few.
Springfield was quite a thriving metropolis in the 19th and early 20th century. Rifles were produced here for the wars, but the depression hit hard here. The flood of 1936 and the hurricane of 1938 devastated the area. In the post World War II era, the economy turned sluggish. Indian Motocycles, one of the largest producers of motorcycles closed in the 1950’s and the paper companies hit harder times.
What is the future of this area for the 21st Century? Will the economy grow? What will Longmeadow be like for future residents? I wonder what Edward Bellamy would predict for the children and the grandchildren of the Pokemon generation.
PHOTOGRAPHY: ART + SCIENCE I recently visited the Connecticut Valley Historical Society in Springfield to do some research. Upon arrival at the charming stone building, on the quadrangle, I found an interesting exhibit called "Wheelchair Unbound: The Art of Joseph Whiting Stock." The artist, whose portraits are on exhibition until March 11, was born in 1815. An oxcart fell on him at age 11 and he was confined to a wheelchair. This handicap did not stop him from being a great Springfield area artist.
He shared workspace with Otis Cooley who was an early photographer. Cooley’s Daguerrean Gallery did skylight photographs, and he was listed in the Springfield City Directory of 1846. The art of photography was in still in its infancy, since the invention of daguerreotypes in 1839.
I have always loved photography and was struck by a quote I saw in the exhibition from a newspaper article. "The beautiful and inestimable Art of Photography may be ranked among the great and most wonderful discoveries of the age, and having attained a high state of perfection, has justly taken an elevated stand among the arts and sciences."
Joseph Whiting Stock’s oil portraits became part of a dying art, as photography replaced traditional portraiture. Photography was so much more convenient than having someone paint a portrait. It only took minutes to capture a likeness with a photograph and an oil portrait took hours or days and then took even more time to dry. In the late 19th Century, efficiency became the priority. The light, shade and beauty of portraiture could be achieved in this new art form. Photographs are like time-capsules, that capture the "human face divine" in a much more realistic way than an artist’s rendering. Photography is the perfect blending of science and art.
PARADOXICAL THEORY OF CHANGE This article is intended to get all Longmeadow residents thinking. What are your favorite things about the town, and what would you like to change? A friend of mine who is a student at the Gestalt Institute in Cleveland explained something she learned about the theory of change. She wrote to me via e-mail: "You cannot change until you know who you are or that you cannot get somewhere until you know where you are." The questions become 1) What is Longmeadow, and what is its identity? In addition, 2) Where is Longmeadow, and what is its relationship to the surrounding area?
I have met wonderful people here. My observations are written from the heart and are not meant to be critical. Every person and every place can benefit from change and growth. It is natural for a place to develop over time. Residents must keep their eyes open and be aware of what is in front of them. A fresh approach to situations is not anti-traditional.As a resident for three ½ years, I am beginning to figure out what Longmeadow is. It is a great place to live, once you get used to it. Yet, this is a very complicated place. This beautiful, historic, safe community is convenient to the highway, and good for commuters. The real estate prices are higher here than the surrounding towns. It is very hard to find very much on the market, and houses seem to sell quickly. With very little land left for new construction, most available houses are older and need work. The schools enjoy a good reputation and two elementary schools will be renovated. For some reason, the facilities at the middle schools and the high school have not been kept up. People who move here from other areas usually do so for the schools.
The town is fiscally conservative and the status quo is treasured. Everything moves slowly here. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line, yet town bureaucracy dictates that government, meetings and organizations must follow antiquated formats. Are we a colony of Boston? Town meetings, selectman’s meetings and even the school committee often operate in a vacuum. Why is change a bad word? Efficiency would be welcome in this place! With an interest in American history and architecture, it is a perfect place for me to live…. However, it is the end of the 20th Century folks!
Living here is like living in an idyllic suburb in the middle of the wilderness. It is like an island, because I have met very few people from surrounding communities. The historic center of Longmeadow is the town green, and the Long Meddowe Days Celebration each May is the one event that brings all the residents together.
Do you have any visions for Longmeadow? What are your personal favorite things about the town? Do you think the town needs to change anything? I welcome your ideas and comments. Please send me your suggestions. Thank you!!!!
P.S. I may be a little late, but Happy Valentines Day!
What is important to you? At this stage in our lives the priorities are 1) The kid’s safety and health 2) The kid’s education, 3) Family time together, and 4) Our sanity. Each day is so incredibly full. I am amazed that anyone can get it all done, and still have their mind intact at the end of the day. We are ALL dealing with demands that are overwhelming. How do I deal with it? I have a secret.
During the week the schedule is packed. The children have tons of activities, there is a house to organize (and maybe clean), laundry that is endless, errands to run, food to buy and cook, appointments, people to call, and friends to meet. Each week there are several unforeseen disasters to cope with, health issues, car problems, personal problems, friend’s problems, sibling conflicts, budget shortcomings, school concerns, homework, work stress, daunting responsibilities as parents and now, as I enter middle-age… aging parents. Yes, I do feel like a sandwich.
So, what is the secret? I try to make some time for me. You say it is impossible, but that is just an excuse. I definitely disagree. Sanity is the most important priority. I am just as overwhelmed as you are. I learned long ago in a parenting class sponsored by my ex-employer that I could not do my new job, as a mom, if I did not take care of myself first. I always try to smile and laugh as much as possible, even if there is hardly anything that makes me feel good. Appreciate all that you have. Stay away from negative people. Do what makes you happy! During MY time, I try to sleep late or wake-up early and exercise. I might meditate, do yoga, take a long walk, take a nap or do something creative. If there is only a short window of opportunity, I might just call an old friend to catch up. We all need someone to listen to us. If I have some time I will read, vegetate, act like a slug, write some letters, look through old photos and take time for my mind to wander. If I did not take an opportunity to refresh my mind, I would totally crack up!
I may not have time to take classes or get that graduate degree, but I do know what I like to do – so I do what I want. We can actually get more done if we take the time to collect our thoughts first. We are all so busy taking care of our kids that we forget to take care of ourselves. As the stewardess says to us all before the plane takes off…"In case of emergency, put on YOUR oxygen mask first, before taking care of your loved ones." Remember these words of wisdom.
Moreover, while we are talking about priorities, remember to stop putting those important things off…. As a friend of mine wrote to me recently via e-mail:
"Learn as if you were to live forever.
Live as if you were to die tomorrow."
